Body? What body?

Bucharest, Romania (AP)
   Romanian authorities have removed 4 lions and 2 bears from a private estate.  The estate is owned by a Romanian gang boss known for his brutality.  The fellow, known as the Pawnbroker, claims the animals were simply oddities and had no other purpose.
Protect your pets,
Rodger ;-P

Requires some skill I guess.

Portland, Maine (AP)
   Robert Smith is now allowed to whistle downtown but he must keep walking according to a courts ruling.  There you go, that's taken care of, next?
Protect your ass-ets,
Rodger ;-P

Ok, I can see his point.

Brockton, Mass. (AP)
   A ten year old boy who didn't feel that he should have to go to bed called 911 to report his mother.  The police responded and explained to the young man that while his point was certainly understandable, 911 was not designed to handle his problem
Stand your ground,
Rodger ;-)

The trick is in enforcement.

Sydney, Australia (Australia Correspondent)
   The Dee Why Grand shopping complex in Sydney has banned screaming children.  The shopping center has posted that "screaming children will not be tolerated and parent and child will be removed."  So who shops mostly at shopping centers?  I'm thinking moms. Yup, what could go wrong?
Protect your par-ent,
Rodger ;-)

Rogue rabbits raid Denver airport!!!

Denver, Colorado (AP)
  Gangs of rogue rabbits are vandalizing cars in the parking lots of Denver International Airport. These bold bunnies are chewing the spark plug wires of vehicles causing humans to spend large amounts of money for repairs and tows.
Protect your auto-mobile,
Rodger ;-)

Boars vs. Hunters, boars win.

Brussels, Belgium (AP)
   In a coordinated attack, 200 hunters went after 170 boar.  In an amazing bit of planning and execution, 169 boar escaped.  (If I was one of the hunters, I would have kept my mouth shut.)
Protect your porker,
Rodger ;-)

Zombie attacks on increase.

Marquette, Mich (AP)
Two local TV stations' Emergency Alert System warned of increasing zombie attacks in the area.  Earlier in the week a Montana town was also reporting increases in zombie attacks through their emergency alert system.
Protect your zombie apocalypse plan,
Roger.  :-P

Numb ass awards in Sweden.

Stockholm, Sweden (AP)
   4 men and two women are going to share a $3000 prize.  These four folks successfully spent 48 hours sitting on ice poles with temperatures as low as -18 degrees F.  I figure these folk won the numb ass and dumb ass awards at one sitting.
Protect your ass-ets,
Rodger










 

Sooo who is in the other grave?

Dallas, Texas (WFAA)
   Widow sues funeral home after finding husband's second grave.  So many questions so little time.
Protect your relatives,
Rodger ;-P

Illicite urination patrols hit Brazil.

Rio De Janerio, Brazil (Reuters)
   The City of Rio has authorized "pee" patrols to cut down on unauthorized urination prior to and during Carnival.  That's right right folks, no more "pee where you are" allowed during the biggest drunken party in the Western Hemisphere.
Protect your excess,
Rodger ;-P

Probably was a "transportation" expense.

Brussels, (Reuters)
   An Austrian member of the European Parliament is under investigation for 1.3 million euros in expenses which included an "elephant."
Protect your transport,
Rodger

Justice is blind but not asleep.

Moscow (AP),
   Russian judge fired after falling asleep several times during a trial in which he convicted a man of fraud.  The defense lawyer posted pictures on the internet.  Kinda hard to keep snoozing secret while on the bench.
Protect your justice,
Rodger ;-P