NAW GEORGE, YOU NEED A BIGGER BAGGY.

Hampton, Ill. (UPI)
   Officials have had to install "stop pooping" signs on bike paths as a result of humans doing #2 on the cyclist roadway. (Filthy humans!!!)
Protect your rims,
Rodger :-P

AND NOW....IRONY.

Chicago, Illinois (UPI)
   156 firefighters and 26 pieces of equipment were called to fight a fire at a fire extinguisher factory. Unfortunately, firefighters were unable to save the fire extinguisher factory.
Protect your ass-ets.
Rodger  :-p

A LITTLE TOO "HOT"

Beruit, Lebanon
   Authorities have seized over 1000 lbs of maxi pads after sensors detected radioactivity. So many questions and so little time.
Protect your hygiene,
Rodger :-)

POTTY POLICE NEEDED

Muncie, Ind (UPI)
   Workers at the local Walmart found a suspicious backpack in the men's public restroom. When police were called they found an active meth lab inside the backpack. The restroom had to be closed until a hazmat  team could clean up the mess, I mean, meth.  (Explains the recent heavy traffic in that particular restroom.)
Protect your Privy,
Rodger :-P